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What are the Benefits of Parallel Parenting in Canada

What are the Benefits of Parallel Parenting in Canada?

For parents in Canada who are divorced or separated, parallel parenting can be helpful, especially when high-conflict relationships make standard co-parenting hard. This organized way of parenting lets both parents stay involved in their kids’ lives while limiting their direct contact with them. It includes clear limits, detailed parenting plans, and separate decision-making in certain areas so that both parents can participate without too much conflict. 

Parallel parenting is a realistic way for many familie00s to handle the challenges of parenting after a divorce that puts the needs of the children first while still letting each parent have their own space.

What is Parallel Parenting?

Parallel parenting is a structured approach to co-parenting designed for separated or divorced parents who experience high levels of conflict. In this model, parents make choices about their children’s needs during their designated parenting time while working independently in their own areas. Usually, they can only talk to each other in writing, like through email or shared plans, and they only talk about important things about the kids.

What are the Elements of Parallel Parenting?

Parallel parenting is based on clear rules and guidelines that are meant to keep parents from fighting and make sure that both parents are involved in their children’s lives. Key elements are:

  • Parallel parenting is a detailed plan for how to raise both children. There isn’t much room for doubt because it spells out plans, roles, and rules. 
  • To avoid arguments, communication is mostly done in writing, like through email or apps, and is only about what the kids need.
  • To avoid confusion or disagreements, decisions about the child’s schooling, health care, or extracurricular activities are split up or made clear.
  • Transitions between parents are handled with minimal contact. To avoid direct contact, drop-offs, and pick-ups can happen in neutral places or at school.
  • The main goal is to keep kids from hearing about fights between parents. 

Benefits of Parallel Parenting

Parallel parenting has many benefits, especially for families dealing with relationships that are very tense after a separation. Here are some of the best things about parallel parenting:

Reduces Parental Conflict

One of the best things about parallel parenting is it significantly reduces direct communication between parents. The model makes co-parenting more peaceful by limiting interactions to written communication and focusing only on things connected to the child. This reduces the chances of arguments. 

Provides Stability for Children

High parental conflict can negatively impact a child’s emotional well-being. Parallel parenting makes the home more stable by keeping kids from dealing with arguments. When both parents take care of their own responsibilities, there is consistency and a clear plan for the kid’s emotional and mental growth.

Encourages Active Involvement of Both Parents

When parents use parallel parenting, both parents are involved in raising their children. Each parent is free to make choices within the time they are given. This encourages responsibility and participation. This balance helps kids get along well with both parents.

Eliminates Ambiguity through Clear Guidelines

A specific parenting plan takes away the guesswork by making it clear what is expected when it comes to making decisions, communicating, and sharing custody. This makes things clearer, which cuts down on confusion and helps both parents focus on doing their jobs well.

Minimizes Stress for Parents

Parallel parenting reduces the stress and mental strain that often come with relationships with a lot of conflict by cutting down on face-to-face contact. Parents can enjoy their time with their kids without worrying about handling tense situations.

Flexibility for Individual Parenting Styles

Each parent can plan their own time with the kids when they use parallel parenting. This allows for different parenting styles without getting in the way, which makes disagreements less likely.

Difference Between Co-parenting and Parallel Parenting 

There are two ways to raise kids after a split or separation: co-parenting and parallel parenting. Each works best for parents who work together in different ways. 

Level of Parental Interaction

Co-parenting: For co-parenting to work, parents must be able to talk to each other and work together. Both parents work together to make choices about their kids’ health, school, and interests outside of school. It needs a lot of trust, respect for each other, and a desire to work together.

Parallel parenting: To avoid arguments, parents don’t talk to each other as much when they’re parallel parenting. During their set parenting time, each parent works alone and makes decisions in their own area. Communication is limited to important issues and is usually done in writing.

Dealing with Conflict

Co-parenting: This type of parenting works best when both parents get along well and can work out their differences. Most of the time, open communication is the best way to solve a conflict.

Parallel parenting: This method is designed to help relationships with a lot of tension by limiting the chances for disagreements. Parents only talk to each other when they have to, and even then, they focus on their children.

Communication Style

Co-parenting: When parents work together, they talk in a casual way. They usually do this through phone calls, texts, or face-to-face meetings. Parents talk to each other about their child’s progress and make choices together.

Parallel parenting: Parallel parenting means that you officially talk to your partner, usually through writing, like emails or parenting apps. It can only be used to share important information, like updates on health, school results, or emergencies.

Making Choices

Co-parenting: When parents co-parent, they make decisions together, no matter who has custody at any given time. They work together on big problems like health care, education, and rules.

Parallel parenting: During their parenting time, each parent makes their own choices, and a detailed parenting plan spells out each parent’s duties so that they don’t overlap.

Process to Implement Parallel Parenting

Setting up an organized system that keeps both parents involved in their children’s lives is an important part of parallel parenting. Here are the steps you need to take to make a parallel parenting plan work:

  • List accurate days, times, and places for pick-ups and drop-offs.
  • Make it clear which parent makes choices about the child’s education, health care, extracurricular activities, and other important things.
  • Set up times and ways for parents to talk to each other, preferably through written means like email or apps.
  • Limits should be respected by not talking about or criticizing the other parent in front of the kids.
  • Allowing the kids to move from one home to another without extra stress.
  • The health and safety of the children should always come first for all decisions and activities. 
  • Get an arbitrator, family therapist, or lawyer to help you plan the parenting

Final Words

In conclusion, parallel parenting is a useful strategy for families dealing with tough situations after separation. This method puts the health and happiness of the kids first by setting clear limits, using structured communication, and making a thorough parenting plan. This also keeps parents from arguing with each other too much. Parallel parenting not only keeps kids from fighting, but it also makes a good space for their mental and social growth.

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